Why I Survived

Carole Moretz and her husband, Ray, lived the cancer experience and today cherish their time together. Moretz will help other couples dealing with cancer resolve intimacy issues and feel close again through a new program. She is the only sex therapist in the area who will specialize in cancer.

When Carole Moretz, R.N., Psy.D., “counsels cancer patients struggling with their disease, she brings a rich background of experience in nursing and psychology. She also brings the experience and perspective of someone who’s been there.

Moretz, a psychologist on the cancer support team in the John and Dorothy Morgan Cancer Center, was first diagnosed with stage IV melanoma at age 28. A goaldirected young nurse at LVH–17th and Chew, a wife and mother, she received treatment and went on with her life. “At 28 you think you’re immortal,” she says. “I believed if I worked hard and kept things clear, life would turn out great.”

And it was great. But life as she knew it ended on a bleak December day 14 years later. Her cancer had come back with a vengeance, metastasizing throughout her body. She was given three to six months to live. She was 42 years old with four children, ages 9 to 16.

“I thought I would die and leave my children without a mother,” Moretz recalls. “I chose my oncologist by how well I thought he would care for my husband when I died.”

Moretz says she doesn’t know why she lived, but she does know it changed her life and her relationships forever, and that has brought her to the work she does today.

“Cancer rips families apart, and many have to blaze through by themselves,” Moretz says. “Even if you survive, everything changes, and nothing is more important than having the opportunity to help people through this.”

After achieving her doctorate, Moretz joined the Cancer Center in 2000, where she counsels individuals, families and groups. She also supports inpatients and makes home visits. And when she sees a need, she fills it—Moretz saw that sexual dysfunction and problems with intimacy were common complaints among cancer survivors, yet little help was available. She has spent the past two years developing a program to address women’s needs, which will be available later this year.

How does she endure the emotion every day?

“I feel sad sometimes, especially when someone gets worse or dies. But it’s OK to feel sad,” she says. “Life is full of sadness, just as it’s full of happiness. I see lots of people survive, too. Life is wonderful and fluid, even in all its changes.”

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